He's so broad you can hardly understand him its what you call thick or locally strong

He went down South once, but said he didn't like it He found the folks down there a little strange

His mum, she wears a patterned wrapped around pinny And likes to talk and awful, awful lot

His diets mainly pies and chippy dinners topped with mushy peas, he can't go wrong

He thought the tube was really idiotic he bought a pint and finished with short-change

His dad drinks tea with nearly every meal obsesses rugby with his brother Scott

Never wears a coat when he goes out Evertime he talks, its more a shout

He met a southern girl when he went out She fell for him there is no doubt

His parents like to tell it as it is want him to settle down have some kids

He likes ale in a big tall glass It makes him more attractive to the working class

Beside the difference of the North / South divide He wanted the London lass, right by his side

But hes always out with all of his mates but they keep calling him to put on his skates

His uses of local terms and expressions Can only be described as really odd

He said you're moving North love, that is right yes she did, now shes his northern wife

Referring to his parents with offensive insults no greater sign of affection has there been

He's so typically, oh so typically, Northern, Northern He's so typically, oh so typically, Northern, Northern

He's so typically, oh so typically, Northern, its hurts