1. The loveliest teller in Milnor / was Clarice, the cleverest they say

Fell in love with a basketball player / who managed the local cafe

They got lost in the snow at his tourney / and rode home on the Galloping Goose

From this humblest start of a journey / how did they build this fabulous crew?

Grandma tell us / tell us please what is your secret

From dozens of eligible dudes / How did you find your Bunny Foo Foo

2. Her first born were Karen and Conni / then Laurie and Sandy and Brian

They sold sweetcorn and made lots of money / there were no farming tools they weren't trying

But she looked around and decided / that five kids just wasn't enough

"Square dancing? Yeah why not, let's try it" / Norwegians, by golly, are tough

Grandma tell us / tell us please what is your secret

How did you maintan your charm / Climbing hay lofts to fetch them / Just two hands to catch them /

with five curious kids on a farm

3. Once Clarice got Norm to try dancing / in the style of both circle and square

Their hobby they kept on enhancing / they'd get calls from Bismark to Eau Claire

After decades of driving their station- / wagons millions of miles cross the land

She said "Darling, we need a vacation" / I've booked us a gig in Japan

Grandma tell us / tell us please what is your secret

Didn't you even hit snooze / When you took all you friends on a cruise

4. When those five kids grew older they scattered / from Lisbon to Taiwan and Texas

Like Clarice they built lives that mattered / And in summer, Deer Lake was the nexus

Her grandkids would fish and hear stories / and she taught them her favorite games

Though our parents imparted her values / We could use some more tips all the same

Grandma tell us / tell us please what is your secret

How did you build such a crew / All from five curious kids on a farm

Epilogue: We don't mean our request to be onerous / please feel free to keep your secrets to yourself

We just thought if we made our feelings sonorous / you might be more likely to help